Do you believe that you put too many expectations on others? Do you feel uncomfortable by some of the expectations others put on you? It is important to be honest about expectations. There are many times when expectations are not met, and relationships are impacted by this. Let’s take a moment to discuss, “Unmet Expectations.”
When was the last time someone asked something of you and you were not able to get it done? Are you honest whenever you are unable to accomplish them? Does it feel uncomfortable when you are being asked to do something that you know you will not be able to? Are you ok when expectations are placed on you?
The other important consideration is to be aware of when you are putting too much expectations on others. Do you ask the person or do you expect them to just do for you? These kind of expectations can seem as though you are taking these individual/s for granted, even if that is not your intention.
How do you handle unmet expectations? Do you respond in anger and complain? Do you communicate why you are disappointed? Too many may take it too lightly when an expectation has been put on others and they are not met. It is so vital to remain honest about what you can and cannot do when someone is asking things of you. If you are not, you can become caught up with arguments and disagreements because you did not do what is asked of you. Also, you must remain honest about when you are unable to meet someone’s expectations. In doing so, you will avoid an unnecessary misunderstanding.
I have been guilty of both, honestly. I have placed too much expectations on others and became very disappointed when they did not meet them. I too failed to meet others expectations that were put on me. This has taught me that it is best to remain an open and honest communication when I am asking something of others. It also means I have to tell others when I cannot do what they are asking of me. This has led to better relationships. When someone fails to meet my expectations, I make sure to communicate with them before rushing to judge them for ‘failing me.’ I also make sure to not make excuses when I cannot do what is asked and reassure the person/s that we can perhaps do things differently to be attainable.
Overall, I believe we can all do better with unmet expectations. Rather than focusing on what someone has not done, why not begin to appreciate what they have. Do not take for granted when you have people in your life who are trying to do things for you even if it may not be exactly the way you thought it should be. Remember, you too can work on meeting an expectation better. We may not meet everyone’s expectations especially when they seem unattainable but we can work on doing what we can. Making an effort demonstrates integrity and a desire to work on doing better.
Share your story. Let me know how unmet expectations has impacted your life. Were you open and honest about it? How did you handle when you disappointed someone because you did not meet their expectations? Allowing ourselves to reflect on how we can do better overall will impact our communication with others and provide healthier relationships. Thank you for taking this moment with me.
Read more blogs like this one: “LISTEN WELL” “DON’T TAKE IT PERSONAL“
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12 thoughts on “UNMET EXPECTATIONS”
It’s good to get expectations out on the table with open communication. However, when owning up to the expectations set forth that were unmet, we can make an effort to do better. As long as those expectations are reasonable and the right thing to do. There may be unjust and unattainable expectations of you that are beyond what you can give. I chose to discuss it and create a plan to work on it or readjust the specific expectations.
Thanks for this reminder in your post.
This is a huge topic. Expectations in a way are the beginning of each dissapointment. Somebody might be doing more than his best to please us and yet we might be dissapointed by him because we expected more. I try to avoid having expectations from others and sometimes even my self. I ask for what I want or need without necessarily expecting a specific answer or action. In my opinion, letting go of expectations can set you free and offer you less dissapointment.
Thank you for making thing about it! Really love it when I read something like this 🙂
Personally for me people have put to much expectations on me. I can not believe how much people just expected me to just meet their standards even when I was just a child. This affected me for a long time and I’m still healing from it. I believe that people should not put expectations on theirs things they can’t even do themselves
This was very interesting. I struggle with balancing meeting other people’s expectations of myself and setting the bar too high for others. Open communication does seem to be the key, and to be appreciate of others actions even if they fail short of my expectations.
Interesting, I did that as well before and learned not to expect anything from people. Mostly would be disappointment from them.
Because I go over and above for people I care about, I would have expectations that were similar and would feel disappointed. Once I realised it was okay to turn down some requests, people got baffled because they wnjoyed receiving what I offered without reciprocating it.
I had to have that conversation also of making sure people close to me did not have unrealistic expectations of me.
It’s helped me a lot.
Open communication and setting boundaries is what has helped me deal with expectations in the past.
I always try to make sure that people know exactly what I can and can’t do and I always openly communicate my needs. I am also a firm believer in reciprocation, so there’s nothing that I would ask of someone that I wouldn’t do for them as well. That way, I can positively set the tone for how my relationships go.
I have learned not to expect because expecting something and not getting it can be heartbreaking. But there is a thin line between being negative and having a positive mental attitude. Always look at the bright side.
This is a fantastic post, I am someone who can place a lot of expectations on others and it can hit hard when they are not met. It is something I am working on, but it’s definitely not a quick change. As you said, I also have not met others’ expectations so know how it feels to be on the other end of things. You outlined the importance of being gentle as we learn and I really appreciate that.
I’ve been guilty of both too when it comes to unmet expectations as well. Wonderful article. Thanks for sharing!